Au Pair Host Parent On-Boarding Checklist

Time is valuable and each year as busy parents onboard a new member to the family, there is so much knowledge that you have to transfer and so much information from safety to the culture of your family. Don’t miss the opportunity at the beginning to start on the best foot forward. This checklist has been modified and refined multiple times by host parents and parents on-boarding nannies. It includes an action packed agenda for the first two weeks to check on that progress.

As a full time working parent with a busy life, I created a check list to help other parents save time and energy researching the knowledge transfer that needs to happen with Parents and Host Families welcome their new caregiver or Au Pair to their household.

Welcoming your Au Pair is the most critical part of the relationship. First impressions can make or break a long lasting relationship.

With any corporation, we ‘onboard’ new employees and as part of the welcome to the company. It is a proven technique to make more happy, integrated employees. While a nanny or au pair may not be a ‘traditional’ employee relationship because they are an integrated part of the caregiver team. I came up with a checklist to help with on-boarding a new family member just as we would with any new team member. 

The situation of a host family with a new au pair are quite obvious in comparison to a new employee. The new caregiver or au pair arrives at his/her new host family excited for a new opportunity to take on a new role. At the beginning of the relationship she (or he) is not aware or informed and usually very uncertain about what that role really entails and what is the structure of the family and how do they handle day to day problems.

So what is involved in bringing new caregivers and au pairs successfully on board and making them a productive role in team parent or part of the team family?

The two parts of the au pair and host family on-boarding equation:

 1.) What does the new caregiver or au pair need to do or adjust in order to find a place in the new family? 

Basically it comes down to thinking about what your caregiver / au pair should focus on to quickly find a place in your family, and what you can do to lead this relationship to happen. So here is an example below of leading by example with an on-boarding plan. Show the expectation of what is needed by the Au Pair and by the Host Family

Here is is an example:

2.) Adjustment behaviors (and support by Team Parent)
What should the first days and weeks in your home to get on-boarded effectively? Instead of a 30-60-90 day plan, we tend to use in corporate America. I tend to lead by example and offer a commitment to adjustment and adaption to our pit crew. 

• Building a Trusting Network. As a newcomer to the care giving team or “team parent” (or new au pair to an organisation or host family). They need to develop relationships with their cluster of au pairs and also with the host family’s own support network (this may mean family friends, neighbors, school teachers, etc). His or her role as a contributing team member depends on being an key part of the family network – on combining information and feedback to establish very warm and trusting relationships both within the host family and also within the community of au pairs and local community. (In the case of an au pair: Having a good local care coordinator (LCC) is absolutely critical to supporting this relationship building. An LCC who is not established or has the ability to watch warning signs with an au pair such as not being able to socialize with other au pairs and isolation from the cluster of au pairs, can cause detrimental effects to the family. The au pair can’t just survive they need to thrive in their host family and community. )

• Asking Questions and Seeking Information. A new team member (and a new au pair) needs to take active participation to fill knowledge gaps by asking questions. Questions could be: ‘What are the manners at the dinner table?’ …’What is the routine for getting ready for school?’ There is so much to learn. An effective au pair should be asking lots of questions to get the information that she needs to do her job. You can support her efforts by a Family or Household Guidebook that has frequently asked questions.

• Seeking Feedback of Expectations. This is proactively overcoming the clarity of how a family would rate his/her performance. Instead of asking about ‘how to do something’, the new aupair seeks out feedback from the family members about his/her performance. “Am I allowed to offer a dessert?” “Did I put too much mustard on the veggies?” “How clean do we need to get the kids chairs?” By actively asking about how his/her performance, the au pair starts to develop a sense of the family expectations and what is going to be requested of him/her. Encourage this dialogue! Partnership doesn’t happen in a silo. Be a mentor the caregiver and encourage their participation in team parent.